This week's WTF Wednesday post is the result of stumbling on this video while surfing earlier this evening. And just so there's no confusion, as I'm sure some of you might wonder, when I say "surfing," I mean web-surfing...not on-a-surfboard-riding-waves-kind-of-surfing. Apparently, this product is the key to a happy marriage. Watch the video below to see for yourself.
WTF?!
And just so there's no confusion, I'm not saying "WTF?!" because of the product itself, which is real, BTW, and available at BuyBetterMarriageBlanket.com. I'm saying "WTF?!" because, I mean, why the hell did it take them so long to invent this? They can put men on the moon (if we are to believe the stories), make cars that start remotely, and even make toilets that flush themselves! But it takes them this long to create a blanket that sucks up the odors of nocturnal gaseous eruptions generated by sleeping husbands?! [Yes, I realize that women fart too, but I guarantee you that in my bedroom, my husband holds the record for not only most farts per night, but also stinkiest farts per night...and he wears that distinct honor quite proudly.] I mean, sheesh, they don't call it "Silent But Deadly" for nothing!
The website proclaims that "you owe it to your marriage" to buy their blanket, which, BTW, "contains the same type of fabric used by the military to protect against chemical weapons." I should hope so. But the funny thing is that they are completely sold out "due to overwhelming demand." Maybe Santa was feeling sorry for all of us housewives and snatched up a bunch of these to give to husbands around the world on Christmas Eve! One can only hope.
The website also says that the blanket makes a great wedding or anniversary gift. You really gotta love the marketing spin of this product...playing up the love and marriage thing. Because really, nothing says love like activated carbon with odor-absorbing microscopic pores for overly-flatulent hubbies.
Ladies, I see new blankets in your future.
